Sunday, March 1, 2009

Tots and snots

The Snot monster has once again invaded our home. For what seems like the 8 millionth time this winter, my lovely little girl is covered in a thick layer of wet, gelatinous, snot. She isn't upset by it, why would she be? It's become her default setting. The slimy darling would probably be lost without the slippery trail she leaves behind her. How else would she find her way from one room to the next? How else would she know EXACTLY which of her blocks she'd already played with if the used ones weren't coated in crusty, dried on, mucous?

I swear to god, this has been the most infectious, disgusting winter on record. Everywhere we go, there are children coughing, sneezing, oozing, vomiting... basically just excreting vile and infectious fluids from any and all orifices and I for one am sick of it. (Yes. For your information, that pun was completely intentional.)

I am sick of family, friends and strangers alike giving her "concerned eyes" every time she so much as sniffles whilst looking at me as though I have "negligent parent" stamped on my forehead. No, I do not neglect my daughter. Yes, I dress her warmly when we go out. No, I do not fed her junk and yes, I know that cleanliness is next to godliness.

She is a baby. Babies get sick. It is a fact of life. Their immune systems don't mature until they are somewhere in the vicinity of two years old and getting sick is how they strengthen and build it. Rationally, I understand this. But being pregnant and the mother of a child who in her thirteen months of life has spent more time in quarantine then out of it and who regularly covers my breasts as well as my favourite wardrobe items in snot before spreading her disease to the rest of the household does not lend itself to rationality. Especially when I am the one left holding the disinfectant whilst "baby plague" morphs into "man flu" in the blink of an eye.

She has had sniffles and coughs and colds and flus. When she was about 6 months old she got the "baby measles" and at 10 months caught the real thing. She's had more fevers then you can shake a stick at (though what good shaking a stick would do I've no idea!) and regularly causes shares in Kleenex to fly through the roof. The vomiting bug spent it's Christmas holidays with us and just recently recommended us to it's good friend the rota virus.

I thought that with the coming of the good weather, we might get a bit of respite and indeed, for a week or two there, things were looking good... And then, on Saturday morning, she sneezed.

Oh well, at least it's not green.


  1. Not green... YET! lol
    yes, Chloe has also been snuffly and snotty and mucusy since... well, what seems like forever!
    she is SO used to it, that when she sees a tissue coming to get her, she places her head in the perfect direction, holds her head stiff and LETS me wipe it! yes, I have a 14 month old who LETS me wipe her nose, in fact, she sometimes even gives a little blow!
    bring on the summer... no, bring on the sun!

  2. Are you serious? Our little snotball has used her experience so that when she sees the tissue coming she wipes it herself with her hand and smears it all over her face and then proceeds to rub her eyes with her snotty hand. Nice.